Flash Fiction

Flash Fiction: Naked

Based on a challenge by John Wiswell. Time to flex those flash writing muscles! It’s been a while.

Warning: contains profanity.


I’ve only been in this perfectly nice hotel for ten minutes and I’m already naked with blood on the floor. It’s going to be to hell getting that mess out of the carpet. I bet the cleaning lady’s going to shit a brick, but so are these poor assholes when they find out the truth.

The timer’s blinking on screen, counting down the minutes. I have 9 left before the silicone dries out, my reserve batteries fail. 8 minutes to find out whether or not this gamble pays out, or I’m dead. I’ve always liked to gamble.

Amateurs. I can’t believe they used a screwdriver to wrench me free. I bet it’s not even sterilized. I suspect my personality chip might be damaged. Mother fucker. Maybe it is. I don’t remember whether or not I liked to swear. They’re lucky that this far from my flesh bod, I no longer have control of its lips.

It was one sweet bod, that Betty.

My sensors are picking up a vibration. Another body on the floor. Great! They want to do a transfer, they’re not as stupid as I thought! If these boys get caught, its going to be for theft, not murder, but man, that’s one fucking ugly piece of flesh.

These scanners aren’t as good as eyes, but even I can tell it’s ghastly. The man’s face reminds me of a potato, with the pock marks and peeling skin to show for it. Did its old owner not take care of it? Disgusting. I bet they found this flesh bod at the morgue, ready to be recycled or pulped.

I’d have settled for a good old fashioned robot chassy. For god’s sake! I’m not even a man! Not that it matters, my first flesh rotted away centuries ago, but human thinking is hard to deprogram.

5 minutes. Someone grabs my chip off the floor.

I wake up jammed in an unfamiliar cranium. The timer’s still going. 3 minutes. I hate this part. New wiring is always a challenge. I’m going to walk like a drunken fool for days. Ahh there, connected with the eye sockets. Blink. Focus.

They’re trying to jam their buddy’s chip into Betty’s socket. Good luck. I can see their hands trembling. I bet it’s their first time. That’s a five million dollar piece of flesh, they’re stitching up like a rag doll. It’s the best body I’ve ever spent time in. We had some good times, me and Betty, brief as it was. One minute.

I stand up on jello legs, taste the alcohol on potato face’s breath, the faint taste of fermentation and decay. I stagger out the door. If one of those boys push me I’ll fall flat on my face, but they don’t bother coming after me. Their eyes are on Betty, her long smooth legs, and tight ass. She’s starting to come to her senses.

Zero. The police are late. I check the timer. There, only by half a second. The elevator bursts open, and I see them rushing past me and I press back against the hallway. Those assholes in the hotel room have no idea. Potato face breaks into a grin, as I hear a ping, notifying me that money’s been wired into my personal account. Reward money for Betty’s return. News travels fast over the police feeds.

It was almost too easy. All it took was slipping a tip that a high quality flesh bod was staying somewhere insecure. Someone was bound to be tempted. Auto programed a prerecorded call to the police the minute my chip touched air. I’m mother fucking brilliant, I tell you. It’s worked every time.

I wonder how long I can keep this scam going. In the meantime, I’m wiring the cleaning lady a big fat tip. I doubt the carpet’s salvageable.

16 Comments to “Flash Fiction: Naked”

  1. Whoa.

    It’s funny, I can see some of your trademarks in there — a slightly dark twist on scifi/fantasy — but the, ahem, language was new. Hehe. I enjoyed the story, although I confess I wasn’t always a 100% sure what was going on. It’s clear enough at the end, though! And for flash fiction, I think that works.

    1. T. S. Bazelli Author

      I was worried it would be a bit confusing, but I’m glad it was clear by the end!

      BUT yeah, really wasn’t sure how the swearing would go over. LOL glad you weren’t entirely put off from reading it. I think some people might be…

    1. T. S. Bazelli Author

      Thanks John! Looking forward to reading a few more challenge takers. That prompt was too good to pass up! I really hope we get to hear your story, even though presumably it won’t involve any body snatching LOL

  2. Profanity – I love a bit of profanity and I loved this. From that opening line it was bang, bang, bang with new information and ideas. If I’m being honest, I struggled a little with understanding the ending but got there in the end. Other than that – brilliant – it’s about you got some new fiction up on here!

    1. T. S. Bazelli Author

      Thanks David! Lunching is no longer allowed at the office desk, so my time to write flash has been cut (hence the lack of fiction lately). Ahh felt good to zip that one off though. PS on ch 8 of part 2 of the Mechanician’s Apprentice! (and I probably spelled that wrong)

  3. I don’t think I’ve ever been inside an AI(?)’s “mind” before. That was quite fascinating! The initial disorientation works, I think, because it is such a foreign perspective and comes together in the end.

  4. This was pretty different from most of the stuff you do. It was a good read, though. 🙂

    One thing I was still a tiny bit confused about at the end: is the protagonist a true AI or is she like some sort of AI signature from a mind upload from what was once a real human?

      1. That’s what I thought, but I wasn’t entirely sure of it. I guess… part of the confusion for me was… where did she get the Betty model in the first place, then…? (If a natural AI… then I figured it was who she was… but if not, then somehow there’s a story about how she got that body in the first place… I’m guessing she didn’t buy it outright, because otherwise collecting on reward money for it doesn’t make sense… so the Betty model must belong to someone else, still…)

  5. FUCK YEAH, profanity. It’s almost profanity for profanity’s sake, but I have to say that you had to go all the way to make this work the way it worked. The profanity adds flavor that keeps the reader going on even though it’s not very clear what’s happening. I can answer myself, but I doubt that it will match your idea of your world. It’s a great direction for your writing.

    1. Thanks Harry 😉 I don’t think it matters if your idea isn’t the same as mine. That’s the wonderful thing about fiction: how much the reader brings to the story. It’s a little like magic.

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